Panic In The Sky!

RA Guy Adventures of RA Guy

PanicRheumatoid Arthritis Guy recently set out to gather information about the Superman comic book “Panic in the Sky”. (This time I decided not to venture into the comic book forums, and instead limited my sources to Amazon. Miss Waxie, I finally learned my lesson!)

Here is a little bit of what I found:

“Don’t confuse 1992’s Superman: Panic in the Sky! with the Adventures of Superman television episode starring George Reeves, in which Superman stops an asteroid on a collision course with Earth. The epic Panic in the Sky story arc, chronicled in eight parts, was a crossover event which was published in the four Superman titles…”

And “Panic in the Sky covers Maxima’s conversion to good guy status and also paves the way for Superman and Maxima joining the new Justice League, in the post-Giffen/DeMatteis era.”

Are you panicking yet?

Seriously though, I was thinking about panic because during the last couple of weeks I had quite a few panic attacks. As anyone who has had a panic attack before can tell you, they can be very scary and unpleasant events. (Having them in the midst of a rheumatoid arthritis flare is even worse.)

I have noticed that when my panic attacks come, they usually spawn like a weird alien – increasing out of seemingly nowhere both in terms of their frequency and severity. Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy is proud to announce that once again, he has beaten the Panic Attack Monster.

But, I must note – that this is a battle that I have fought many times before. It usually coincides with my rheumatoid arthritis crisis moments. During this period of healing and recovery that I am recently entering, I plan to dedicate a part of each day to learning new methods that will help prevent a recurrence of these panic attacks.

A few years ago, soon after I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, I was in the midst of a major flare. One though continued to pop up again and again in my head – If I could only transplant my head onto another body, everything will be okay. I used to think it was absoutely silly for me, a grown man, to be thinking such a thought. Then I begin to hear from other individuals living with chronic pain that they too often thought the same things.

Upon accepting that I could not undergo a head transplant (hey, at least it sparked a period of science fiction reading that was fun!), I slowly began to come to terms with the concept that this way my body, for better or for worse. (If only I had signed a prenup before I was born…)

Initially, when I would reaffirm this idea to myself – the panic attack would start. An overwhelming feeling of claustrophobia would overtake me, and the only thought on my mind was I have to get out of my body, now!

Through the years I have gotten much better at accepting the chronic nature of my illness. Along with this acceptance went the realization, once again, that this was my body and I could not escape it or exchange it for another one. Being able to tell this to myself without provoking a panic attack was a hugh achievement.

Still, during the darkest moments of my most severe flares, thoughts of wanting to escape my body continue to appear, along with the panic attacks. Windows are opened to allow fresh air into the room. I lay down on the bed and try to concentrate on deep breathing. I surround myself with music and art books that can be use to create a distraction during these moments of heightened anxiety. Though frightening, these panic attacks eventually pass. And with each new panic attack, I get just a little better at coming out of them more quickly, until eventually they subside.

Right now I want to tell myself that these panic attacks will never return. But I will settle with the comfort in the knowledge that if they do return, I will get through them, like I have already done many times in the past.

If you too have faced panic attacks and have your own tricks and methods that help you cope with them, please do share!

Stay tuned…for the next adventure of Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy!