Comments on: Rewrite

By: Morgan

Morgan — Sat, 15 May 2010 22:39:05 +0000

I was diagnosed with RA a few months ago, but I was diagnosed with a panic disorder almost fifteen years ago. My anxiety has been especially bad this last year and only became worse when I found out about the RA. If I had a panic attack before, I could move on once it was over, but now everything from the pain to the unpredictability and the doctors to the medication heightens my anxiety level.

I have been filled with a lot of anxiety this week especially and had a debilitating panic attack on Thursday night. I kept thinking that I can’t deal with both of these issues for the rest of my life. I might be able to handle one or the other, but the RA and the anxiety is just too much. I continued to lay there and feel sorry for myself until my husband came home from work to take care of me. Those thoughts have been hanging around ever since.

So I want to say thank you for this post. It gave me something to think about not only the next time I am in pain, but also the next time I have a panic attack. Now I will remind myself that the panic will end and I will start again tomorrow. Maybe I will be a little unsteady as I shake off the anxiety, but I have done it before and I can do it again.

Thank you so much.
Morgan

By: Kali

Kali — Sat, 15 May 2010 02:00:09 +0000

One of the things I’ve done that helps me with needing or not needing the crutches is that they don’t go ‘away’. I keep my crutches in an umbrella stand all the time. (er, usually. Right now they’ve been in the car for a couple of weeks) When I need them, I grab them on the way out the door, when I don’t, they are there ready for me. The fact that my crutches have a place where they always belong is easier on me because then I never have to feel like things are bad because they are getting pulled back out. (Okay, that only works so well – I do still sometimes grumble when I need to go back to using them, but the last few times it’s been because the dog isn’t very good at coordinating himself with my crutching self and we end up having to stop and adjust things far more often than I’d like)

I also try to remind myself that this moment does not last a lifetime. This exact confluence of factors happens this once, and once I get through it, it’s done. I try to figure out which factors I have control over, and attempt to prevent them from happening (or at least, from happening in conjunction with the others). Again, it only goes so far, but it helps me stay on top of the depressive thoughts.

~Kali
http://www.brilliantmindbrokenbody.wordpress.com

By: RA Guy

RA Guy — Fri, 14 May 2010 16:52:09 +0000

Thanks for all of the comments. Yes, last night I read Lene Anderson’s wonderful blog on “Staying Sane” – it was just what I needed. I posted it here on my blog in hopes that others may read it as well.

I started my day drinking my coffee while taking a long, hot bath. Plus, it’s Friday! I’m sure I’ll get through this flare as I’ve gotten through others…it can just get hard at times when the constant pain starts sending it’s own signals to the mind.

By: Lori

Lori — Fri, 14 May 2010 16:49:04 +0000

Feeling HOT, HOT, HOT! I’m sharing your pain. We’ve been getting a lot of mixed weather. Rain, sun, rain, sun. The air pressure can drive a person nuts! Feels like being squeezed in vice-grips. :-\

By: Kelli

Kelli — Fri, 14 May 2010 15:05:44 +0000

Your posts have a tendency sometimes to make me cry. My heart just breaks when I think about the daily struggles that some of us are going through to get through a single moment. The concrete description makes my feet hurt just thinking about it. And then you seem to somehow turn it around right at the end and leave readers with an optimistic zing.

I know that you know you are not a failure. But that doesn’t change the fact that we struggle with that ugly feeling, does it? It’s like a continual process of dealing with the loss of our abilities. I hate it! Praying that if the crutches come out you will think highly of yourself for doing what you need to do in order to take (good) care of yourself. And that you have the right words for people that may question why you are using them. Thanks for sharing, RA Guy.