Comments on: How To Be Sick: Discussion 3

By: Kate @ Cooking with Arthur

Kate @ Cooking with Arthur — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 11:03:11 +0000

Going through a massive flare at the moment, and I’ve had to reassess what I thought were pretty good coping skills so this is all very timely – thanks for the discussion.

I really like the way you sum up accepting that we can’t always beat the illness, so sometimes what we can change is how we experience it. I actually think people with chronic illnesses learn to accept impermanence sooner than our peers and for me, it’s been one of hardest but most important lessons.

By: Summer Day

Summer Day — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 15:59:11 +0000

Nancy, Thank you and I happy this was helpful to you. I believe Chronic illness is most difficult mentally by far more so, than any other part of it. This is why Toni’s book is so wonderful!

By: RA Guy

RA Guy — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 01:35:14 +0000

A year ago this month, during my WFE (worst flare ever!), I was really struggling…not only with the actual pain and disability, but also with my thoughts and emotions. It was during this time that I told myself *something* had to change…and if my pain and disability wasn’t going to change, then I’d just have to change my reaction to it. It was only once I decided to go down this path that I realized how much time and energy I was dedicating to trying to make the pain go away. When I started focusing instead on trying to improve my coping skills, and on trying to accept the pain as much as possible, this got much better. Sure, the pain and disability was still there, but I finally felt ‘complete’ again. Being introduces to the concept of dukkha was interesting; it really explains so much of what I’ve been figuring out over the past year.

One thing that has really driven home the idea of impermanence is Shinzen Young’s “Break Through Pain: A Step-by-Step Mindfulness Meditation Program for Transforming Chronic and Acute Pain.” When it feels like the pain had completely grabbed hold of my body, I often practice a meditation titled “Working With Local Intensity and Global Spread.” With this meditation, I’m able to differentiate between different intensity levels around my body. This can initially seem impossible, when it just feels like overwhelming pain *everywhere*, but once I start differentiating these levels, the hold is has on my begins to break up…and instead of feeling like my pain is one monolithic thing, I can really begin to see it as a group of different sensations.

By: Mombeenthere

Mombeenthere — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 01:04:58 +0000

Amy, your activities sounds absolutely wonderful. I’m jealous but I am happy for you that you can still do these things. Just the mention of these types of activities makes me feel warm inside.

By: Mickey

Mickey — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 00:37:36 +0000

For ten years after I became too ill to work, I could not get disability and had absolutely NO money. Thankfully, one of my daughters took me in and fed me, but she didn’t have much money either so things were often hard. As the years went on, my clothes became ragged, all my “stuff” was broken and medical care was sometimes hard to come by. I did a lot of “suffering.” Then somewhere along the way, I learned to “sit in the moment.” I realized that, in this moment, I have everything I need and that fear of want in the next moment was a kind of suffering I didn’t have to accept. Life got a lot easier with that realization. And as a bonus, I learned the difference between “need” and “want” when it comes to material things. Now I have a tiny income and for the first time in my adult life, I find I have all the money I need! Now I’m looking for to learning how Toni came to accept the permanence of her illness.