Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy’s hand are being attacked like never before.
This morning, I was not able to get out of bed until around 11:00 am. Even at that, the only thing that got me moving was knowing that if I wanted to get a Diclofenac injection today, I needed to be at the clinic by noon. My hands were the most swollen that they have ever been, and the skin was bright red. Normally, the right hand has always hurt more than the left hand…but not now – they are both hurting equally.
At the moment I am post-injection, doing a tad bit better (at least I am typing…yesterday in class I reached a point where I could not even hold my Dr. Grips pen), even though I know that I really won’t see results from the Diclofenac for another two or three days. I have something to look forward to, though, if my hands do indeed continue to worsen in the next 48 hours.
Two night ago I woke up in the middle of the night with a moment of panic. I had seen an image of myself where my body was rotting away like fruit. This dream startled me, and I woke up right away. Before my anxiety got any worse, I started focusing on my breath, and before I knew it I was back asleep.
Last night, I had a dream that I was organizing an art exhibition in one of the large old-style houses that are still found where I live – tall ceilings and hardwood floors. In my dream, I was having a blast as I connected the architectural space to the stories that were being told in the paintings. It was a very pleasant dream, and I have continued to think about is since I’ve been awake.
This morning I needed help taking a bath and getting dressed. I’ve needed help before, but not quite like today. For a while, I almost had no use of my hands. I was bathed and towel dried. I was helped to groom myself, and finally helped to dress myself.
So yes, maybe my body is moving in a direction opposite than what I wish would be the case. I do, however, continue to maintain control of my mind and my dreams, and I know that this will carry me far.
Stay tuned…for the next adventure of Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy!