Rough Start

Every so often, while Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy is sleeping, he starts to cry in his dreams. I find myself overcome with feelings of intense pain. And then I wake up, and realize that it wasn’t just a dream. I really am crying, and I really am in lots of pain.

It feels really weird to wake up crying, but I continue to get more used to it. I used to feel like this cast a pall over my day, but now I know otherwise. When the pain gets so bad that it interrupts my sleep and my dreams, it’s okay to wake up with a few tears.

And as usual, I’ll figure out how to make the most out of my day – despite the rough start.

Stay tuned…for the next adventure of Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy!

15 Comments
15 comments
  1. Millicent says:

    I think that crying is a way to relieve stress, even & especially if it happens when you’re asleep. And I feel like that has to be a good thing.

  2. cateepoo says:

    Hugs RA Guy! It broke my heart to read this post today as I know how hard nights can be and I hate that you are having to experience this type of pain. Okay, here is another hug just in case you need it.

  3. RA Guy says:

    I thought I was the only one who went through this as well…although I am sorry that others have to go through it as well, I am glad to know that I am not alone.

    Millicent, I agree. Obviously my body has to cry – and it does – just going through that transition from dream crying to realizing it’s real crying can be a little unsettling at times.

    Cateepoo, thanks. Here I am just a couple of hours later, already doing much better. Last night the temperatures dropped and it rained all night long, so I know that has some effect on my RA getting worse as I slept.

  4. Sister FlareUp says:

    You are a super hero. So brave to share with the rest of the world experiences that can be so overwhelming and close to the heart. Thank you.

  5. Wren says:

    Aw, RA Guy. I’m glad you’re feeling a bit better now, later in the day. I’ve never had that happen to me — I always wake up from the pain first, and THEN cry. For me, crying at all over the pain is unsettling. I was told as a child that crying didn’t help anything and that I should just suck it up, you know? While I know better now, that early training sticks in spite of me, and it’s still difficult for me to let the tears fall. I’m glad you can do it — even when you’re sleeping.

    Here’s hoping that you continue to feel better and better as the day passes.

  6. Sherri Taylor says:

    No Superhero not you too!!!!! Big warm hugs your way…..Funny
    thing my Rhemuy said he doesn’t beleive weather effects RA ….We
    know better, It’s pouring in sunny CA and I haven’t had this much pain in months…..hummm I beginning to think my Rhemuy might just be the Joker….. ;)

  7. ness says:

    I can understand this but not relate because for the last year or so have felt unable to cry???? just cant seem to get it out??? maybe something to do with all meds am on….i feel sad but never can get to the point of crying and know would feel so much better to do so….hate wakin up with pain but still feel sleepy and sore so dont hav energy to reach and take pain relief or get heat packs so just stay sore for hours….silly i know

  8. Sarah says:

    *gentle hugs* I thought it was just me (and that I was going crazy because of it). Thank you for being brave enough to say what’s really going on and helping the rest of us know that we are not alone.

  9. Remicade Dream says:

    I have the same problem as Ness – I can’t seem to cry. I would like to. I think it would help. I never had problems crying before, and hadn’t considered that it could be the medications.

    Thank you for sharing this!

  10. Sunita says:

    I felt so sad when I read your words. I hope you’re not getting too depressed. I must admit to just taking Diclofenac when it gets really bad…and sometimes I cry, especially when I feel I can’t move. Methotrexate and Leflunomide didn’t agree with me. Humira seems to be having a positive effect…at least so far. You mustn’t get consumed with this thing. You’re a strong lad.
    Love Sunita

  11. Lana says:

    RA Guy, you are not alone. I have had similar nights. I think that is just all part of the disease. Hang in there superhero.

  12. Lene says:

    I think it’s wonderful that your body finds a way of releasing the pain and sadness -once you sort of get a handle on what it is and what it means, I think it might make it easier to get through the day because you’ve acknowledged the feelings. When I was 11, I was in a rehab hospital for three with months and it was an awful place. It’s where I learned that crying doesn’t change anything, so I stopped. And 35 years later, I’ve come to realize that holding it all in just makes it worse – it actually increases my pain levels, so I’m trying to learn to cry again. I’m told it can be healing.

    The one good thing that the rehab hospital taught me, though, is this: set your alarm clock to about two hours or so before you have to get up, take some painkillers with a bite of apple or some crackers (it gives your stomach something to do with the pills instead of trying to eat itself). That way when you get up, the painkillers are working and it’s easier to get going. I also take painkillers before I go to bed, which means the pain is controlled enough that I can get some restful sleep.

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